MANAGEMENT HUMOUR: THE ERUPTION OF HELMET HEADS

“THE ERUPTION OF HELMET HEADS” (FUNNY BOSSES AND MANAGEMENT HUMR) the author is drawing his readers attention towards “HUMOR AT THE WORK PLACE”. The life is what we make it.

This book is a masterclass in how to defy a boring world with mischief.

Some funny story which taught Business Morals and Ethics. Check out now -

Lesson 1: Naked Wife
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.

After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,

“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next-door neighbour,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be able to prevent avoidable exposure.

Lesson 2

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. 

Lesson 3

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Management is a subject that even many managers concede is ripe for the humorous take. We are all being managed and/or managing something/someone. And all of us can do with a few laughs. So, here’s a short but hopefully sharp selection of management humour.

Naturally, the higher you are in the management hierarchy, the more you are suitable for a funny take. 

Let go of inhibitions. Laughter opens us up, freeing us to express what we truly feel and allowing our deep, genuine emotions to rise to the surface.

https://www.amazon.in/ERUPTION-HELMET-HEADS-BOSSES-MANAGEMENT-ebook/dp/B0789RYPBJ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1534142654&sr=8-1&keywords=The+eruption+of+helmet+heads

SIGNIFICANCE OF OM(Aum) IN HINDU RELIGION

OM (Aum) a mystic syllable, considered the most sacred mantra in Hinduism and Tibetan Buddhism. It appears at the beginning and end of most Sanskrit recitations, prayers, and texts. The syllable "Om" or "Aum" is of paramount importance in Hinduism.

OM (Aum) Om is a sacred sound, a spiritual icon and a mantra. It is a Sanskrit word that translates as “Source” or “Supreme.

The sound itself helps to calm us down and ease our central nervous system which can be over stimulated in our go go go type of world we live in.

What does the symbol Om represent?

The Om symbol written in Sanskrit represents everything. The material world of the waking state is symbolized by the large lower curve. The deep sleep state is symbolized by the upper left curve. The dream state, lying between the waking state below and deep sleep state above, emanates from the confluence of the two. The point and semicircle are separate from the rest and rule the whole. The point represents the state of absolute consciousness. The open semicircle is symbolic of the infinite and the fact that the meaning of the point cannot be grasped if one limits oneself to finite thinking.

What is the meaning of om?

We’ve all heard about this word called “OM”. But, what is it? What does it mean? Can it be translated into English? Not exactly. If you chant it does it somehow change you or your religion? Absolutely not.

Let's dispel some of the mysteries and misunderstandings about Om / Aum so we better understand its meaning.

Om is an ancient Sanskrit “word” that was first felt by rishis as they meditated. It was more about the essence of Om than the chanting of it. Eventually as the experience was shared the word came forth and people started chanting it to get the experience of it. So, you ask, what is the experience of Om?

It is somewhat difficult to describe with words, but Om represents everything. It is said to be the seed of all of creation. Just like an acorn seed has the immense power and beauty of a mighty oak tree. This seemingly small word contains all the power of the universe. It is the beginning, middle and the end of it all or the past, present and future.

Chanting Om brings into your awareness the physical reality of this world and your body, the subtle impressions of the mind and emotions and the thoughts and beliefs of your life and this world.

As the Mandukya Upanishad tells us the perfect state or super conscious state and all that precedes it are a part of Om. The sound can also be displayed in its more complete form of Aum. When written this way it appears as if the sound has three parts. It has four.

The A (aahhh) sound represents the creation aspect of the universe and all the gross objects within it. Ahh is the beginning of all sounds. This is the most common letter that starts alphabets. It connects us to our sense of self, the ego. With this syllable you experience the existence of the world through the activity of the senses.

When you chant this sound notice that it is produced in the throat and back of the mouth where the tongue is rooted and resonates in the lower abdomen. The first sound embodies “Sat”, the sound that starts to bring you back to unity, to the truth of your existence.

The U (oooh) sound signifies the maintaining energy of the universe and the subtle impressions of the mind. It connects us to an inner sense of something greater than that which we can see and feel with our senses. Oooh lets in lightness, clarity, balance and goodness. When you chant this letter, the sound moves forward between the tongue and the palate up to the lips and vibrates in the solar plexus. The sound denotes “Chit”, an illumination of knowing, pure wisdom.

The M (mmmm) sound characterizes the transformative energy of the universe and the thoughts and beliefs of your being. This sound unites you to the awareness of oneness. It allows you to slow down to feel the connectedness of all that is. The sound “mmmm” is produced by closing the lips and it vibrates the crown of the head. The sound symbolizes “Ananda”, to be at one with bliss everywhere with all things.

The fourth sound is silence or anagata. It is the vibration which is beyond verbal pronunciation. It is pure consciousness of the Self or the Atman. The unity of Sat Chit Ananda (I exist, I know, I am blissful) is experienced here.

As you can see the experience of Om is multifaceted. It truly is an experience of all in everything. It is said that the sound of Aum includes the entire process of sound and all other sounds are included within it. Therefore, Om is called the seed sound (Bija), the original sound from which all other sounds and worlds come from. Therefore, Om is said to represent God, Brahman, Source, Universal Consciousness. Because it has the power to create everything.

When chanting Om aloud, the sound will naturally evolve through the three phases corresponding tot the three letters A-U-M. Like the experience of Om as a sense of completeness and pure consciousness, the three syllables are not distinct or separate phases, but a continuous motion of the body, breath and awareness.

Now, the true power of Om lies in the experience of Om. Reading this can help the mind understand but it cannot give you the experience. Chant this, by yourself, with your friends, in your community. Allow the experience of all the words above to soak into your being. Feel the power each syllable has as the sound vibrations move from the low abdomen, up through the solar plexus and chest all the way to the tip top of the head.

Let the vibrations clear and cleanse your energy system and chakras. Find wholeness and healing in this easy to remember mantra.

Many yoga classes begin and end with the chanting of Om three times. This mantra allows the energy of the group to begin the process of harmony by breathing together and sharing in this mantra. It tunes each person into themselves and reminds the body and mind to set aside worldly concerns and to turn your attention inward to the everlasting joy yoga can bring.

Repeating Om at the end of a session, together with the traditional “Namaste”, is a declaration of respect for the practice and each other. It also allows you to carry forth the inspiration of yoga to everyone and encourage growth in yourself and others through your presence alone.

Om is an amazing tool that all people of all faiths can utilize to bring focus and awareness to the greater meaning of life.

 Q: What does this Om mean?

 A: The Vedic culture unequivocally states that Om is the best name of Ishwar. Refer Yoga Darshan 1.27-28

Om is made from three syllables – A (अ), U (उ), M (म्)

Now each of these syllables represent various characteristics of Ishwar or God or Supreme.

For example,

A represents vast, universal, worth being worshipped

U represents brilliant, minute, source, controller

M represents infinite, undying, knowledgeable, caring

These are just few examples. However, Om summarizes essence of all other names of Ishwar.

Om reminds us that we can move past our physical and mental states of consciousness and connect with the divine – both in ourselves and others. It has been said that Om is the sound of the universe. In its essence, Om represents the sound of divinity in all things in the past, present and future.

“Om” is the imperishable word. Om is the universe, and this is the exposition of Om. The past, the present, and the future, all that was, all that is, and all that will be is Om.

”सुनो कहानी – “यादें बचपन की”

इस पुस्तक के माध्यम से मैंने यह प्रयास किया है कि रोमांचक एवं बेहतरीन कहानियों का एक संग्रह मैं पाठकों के सम्मुख प्रस्तुत कर सकूं। यह संग्रह हिंदी की उत्कृष्ट कहानियों का समूह है जो कि आपको अपने अतीत में ले जाएगा एवं कुछ पलों के लिए आपका बचपन लौट आएगा बचपन में जब हिंदी की नई पाठ्यक्रम की पुस्तक हाथ में आते ही सबसे पहले नजर उस में प्रकाशित कहानियों पर होती थी और उन कहानियों को पढ़कर हम अक्सर रोमांचित हो उठते थे। इस संग्रह में भारत की मिटटी की भीनी भीनी खुशबू बसी हुई है जो कि आपके रोम रोम को पुलकित कर देगी। यह एक पीढ़ी को दूसरी पीढ़ी से जुड़ने का कार्य भी करेगी। क्योंकि यह कहानियां आजकल के पाठ्यक्रम से लुप्त हो गई हैं यह संग्रह सभी वर्ग एवं आयु के पाठकों के लिए है आशा है कि यह कहानियां आप को आनंदित कर पाएंगी एवं आपके दिल को छूने का प्रयास करेंगे यह कहानी संग्रह ”सुनो कहानी – “यादें बचपन की” एक अनूठा प्रयास है जो कि पाठकों को पसंद आएगा और आपका भरपूर मनोरंजन करेगा।

Suno Kahaani: Yaadein bachpan ki (Hindi Edition)

1 August 2018

by BHAGWAN KHEMANI

  0

Subscribers read for free.Learn more.

  205to buyKindle Edition

Keep some time for yourself life will be happier

Increase Your Happiness by Making Time for Yourself

You have multiple priorities on your mind at any given time.

Food, kids, laundry, cleaning, friends, work, bills, relationships, home, car, shower, sex, exercise, hobbies, not to mention politics, economics, scientific breakthroughs, the environment, public education or healthcare.

You are in constant movement, getting things done, going places, talking to people.

Not only are you thinking about many things at the same time, recent Harvard research indicates that you're thinking about something other than what you are doing in the moment at least 47% of the time.

You spend most of your life engaging with a wandering mind*, thinking about everything you need to do, pondering world affairs and absentmindedly doing what needs to be done right now.

You are giving life half of your attention because almost 50% of the time you're thinking of something other than what you're doing.

When your life is guided by thoughts about things you must do or things you have done you will likely fail to focus on the present. And you might experience a downward spiral* into stress and unhappiness.

Your focus is on everything and everyone except yourself.

You are rarely on your own list!

You feel responsible for "getting everything done."

This mentality incorporates the thinking “If I don’t do it, who will?”

When you focus on everything except yourself you might feel angry, irritable, frustrated, disappointed, stressed, depressed, lethargic and you might head right for the chocolate and potato chips.

GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK!

Downward Spiral* or Upward Spiral*?

Stress or Ease?

Grumpiness or Happiness?

At some point you must make a firm decision that you will stand up for your happiness at all costs! No matter how many things need to be done or how many people you need to talk to right away.

You must acknowledge your happiness as your number one priority.

If you slack on making yourself a priority the consequences can be unwelcome.

Your unhappiness will pervade your family, your work and your community, even if you don't intend to spread those feelings to family and friends.

When you are ready to:

1.   admit your happiness is important

2.   acknowledge creating time for yourself is essential

3.   create a self-based happiness practice with strict boundaries

Then determine what you will do within your happiness practice.

According to the Harvard Gazette:

Dan Gilbert, a professor of psychology at Harvard, found people were happiest when making love, exercising or engaging in conversation. They were least happy when resting, working or using a home computer.

Within your happiness practice, set aside time to make love, exercise and engage in meaningful conversation. Avoid idle rest, overwork or unproductive time in front of the computer.

I would add: Build in daily happiness-boosting routines and engage in meaningful acts of service. Your health and happiness are your top priorities in life.

You must make time for yourself.

You can design a life where your happiness is your foundation.

It's time to put yourself first and make happiness your top priority.

Who else is going to do it for you?

Start today! Make love! Exercise! Call a good friend and have a meaningful conversation! Express gratitude! Smile and laugh! Sing and dance! Jump up and say, “I'm happy!” Do something that engages your heart!

10 immortal lessons from the Bhagavad Gita:

A guidebook to life

The Bhagavad Gita is one of India’s ancient texts derived from the epic poem, The Mahabharata. Throughout history, this still stands as the longest poem to have been written, with over 100,000 shlokas or over 200,000 verses. Although only a part of this huge text, the Bhagavad Gita is perhaps one of the most important and highly revered yogic texts ever to have been written. The Bhagavad Gita is one of the greatest Religious Spiritual Book. Considered to be a doctrine of universal truth. Bhagvad Gita shows path to the lost, answer to the confused and wisdom to all. It is one of the greatest spiritual books the world has ever known. The primary purpose of the Bhagavad- Gita is to illuminate for all of humanity the realization of the true nature of divinity; for the highest spiritual conception and the greatest material perfection is to attain love of God!

Texts like The Upanishads and the Dhammapada are also part of this epic poem, but it is the Bhagavad Gita which is often cited as the one that holds the key to personal transformation:

As the third of the classics, the Bhagavad Gita is a map and a guidebook. It gives us a systematic overview of the territory [of life], shows various approaches to the summit with their benefits and pitfalls, offers recommendations, tells us what to pack and what to leave behind. More than either of the others (the Upanishads and the Dhammapada), it gives the sense of a personal guide. It asks and answers the questions that you or I might ask – questions not about philosophy or mysticism, but about how to live life effectively in a world of challenge and change.

10 immortal lessons you can use from the Bhagavad Gita:

1.  Liberation does not mean that one should renounce the world.  By performing one's worldly duties, one can attain true liberation.

2.  Our soul is immortal. Even after our death, our soul lives, it just changes bodies.

3.  One should not get caught in the web of desires. A desire sometimes triggers one to perform an unkind action, so it's best to witness the world dispassionately. Desires would simply come and go. 

4.  One has the right to work, but never to the fruits of work. One should never engage in action for the sake of reward, nor should one long for inaction.

5.  When one's mind dwells on the objects of senses, fondness for them grows, from fondness comes desire, from desire anger. Anger leads to bewilderment, bewilderment to loss of memory of true self, and by that, intelligence is destroyed, and with the destruction of intelligence one perishes.

6.  What belongs to you today, belonged to someone yesterday and will be someone else's tomorrow.

7.  We came in this world empty-handed and we will go from this world empty-handed. Wealth, relationships, position, respect, valuables - everything will be left here.

8.  Whatever has happened is good, whatever is happening is good and whatever will happen, will be good. One's life is in the hands of the creator and one should never lose faith in the creator.

9.  Selfishness clouds one's wisdom. When self-interest is put aside, clarity prevails in the mind.

10. The supreme force dwells within you. You are God and God is you.

5 Mudras for Everyday Magic

                                             

                                               

             

In the modern world, many of us have a mentality of scarcity and lack.

Scarcity mindset keeps you grounded in fear— fear of there not being enough of whatever it is you desire, whether it’s money or love or travel. When you fear that there isn’t enough for everyone, you forget that the universe is an abundant place.

A scarcity mindset can be incredibly convenient. I see this all the time with my yoga business coaching clients. Your ego loves it because it keeps you small. If the world is a scarce, scary place, then you don’t really have to go for what you truly desire anyway, because you probably could never get it. You don’t have to rise to your full potential, be your highest self, and create your most amazing life.

1.Ksepana Mudra — Releasing Negativity
Clear your energy field, cleanse your emotions. Try this mudra after being in a large crowd, following an argument, or when you find yourself caught up in the throes of negativity.

Clasp your hands with index fingers touching flat on each other (point downward) at sacral chakra (below the navel). Cross the thumbs. Affirm “I fully release all negativity from my body, mind and soul. Pure healing energies flow into me now.” Take several deep, slow breaths. With each exhale, release all the drama and baggage. With each inhale, take in the pure loving energies of the divine. Duration: 2 minutes or more.

                              

2.Prana Mudra — Energizing
Usher in vital life force energy. Use this when you feel drained, fatigued or depressed.

Join your thumb with both your little and ring finger, while keeping the middle and index fingers extended. Hold your hands in either a vertical or horizontal position. Take several deep breaths and place your focus on the pure revitalizing energy that is pouring into your body. Each cell is being fully revitalized now. Affirm, “I plug into the universe and recharge my batteries.” Duration: 5-30 minutes.

Practicing mudras engages both the body and the mind, creating a very focused and powerful healing practice.

                       

3.Mudra for wealth (9 jewels)

The nine jewels symbolize wealth of life according to the eastern tradition. From these nine jewels consists body, mind and consciousness of a human and the environment. Combining all nine jewels in one bowl, we confirm the union of the soul and body, the union the a human and space. The full bowl symbolizes prosperity and wealth.

How to form this mudra: Four fingers of the left-hand support from the down and embrace the same fingers of the right hand. The thumbs of the both hands put aside freely, forming a bowl.

4.KUNDALINI (SEX) MUDRA

This mudra awakes and activates the sexual power. Kundalini mudra associates with sex, union of man and woman origins

How to perform this mudra

Clench your both fists. Now stretch your forefinger of the left hand and thrust it from the down in the first of the right hand. The thumb-cushion of your right hand should lay on the forefinger-tip of the left hand. Performing this mudra pull down your hands as lower as possible, so your hands are in the lower area of your abdomen.

Practice it three times a day for 15 minutes.

5.Lotus Mudra for Opening to Abundance

·         The Lotus Mudra belongs to your heart centre and symbolizes pure love, affection, communication, and connection.

·         The open flower helps to open you up to receiving abundance.

·         This mudra manifests prosperity, health, compassion, joy, affection, and love.

Here’s how to do it:

Bring your hands together so that the outer sides of your pinky fingers and thumbs touch. Create a basket shape with your hands by opening the fingers wide but maintaining the contact of the thumb and pinky fingers. Really spread the fingers wide apart, still maintaining the contact of the thumb and pinkies. Inhale and bring the lotus shape to the centre of your chest. Stay for several breaths and focus on the feeling in your hands. Let the mind soften. Let the heart open. And let the entire mind, body, and soul prepare to receive love, abundance, health, wealth, success and true compassion.

“Sow a thought,
reap an action;
sow an action,
reap a habit;
sow a habit,
reap a character;
sow a character,
reap a destiny,”